it's very hard to lose a parent, even when you know they are sick, and you know they won't be here for a long as you want them to be.
i am sad not only because my dad is gone, but because he suffered so in the last few weeks.
and I miss him. I feel like I've cried almost as much the last few days as I did in the days after he died.
and last week, my childhood home was torn down, and Thomas, our dear fellow-poster died, and it all feels a bit overwhelming, to pile these other losses on top of what I'm shouldering.
so I started walking every day, a little bit, and I'm focusing on healthy eating and drinking lots of water - because crying does tend to dehydrate a person.
grief is hard.