Top Ten Lists

Top Ten Reasons I (Reginald Jennings) Am Not The One Who Attempted To Murder Katy Bell

10) She wasn't worth the effort
 9) Wouldn't want to upset Lila by littering the house with
    a corpse
 8) I was in another state...yeah that's the ticket.  I was
    in... Connecticut
 7) Didn't think of it (seriously)
 6) So many other people in line ahead of me
 5) I don't do that sort of thing... anymore
 4) I wouldn't have used Quinobarbitol and Digoxin; would
    have used common household poison, Drano
 3) Too obvious and cliche
 2) I'm not a Quartermaine; I do have some moral fiber
And the number one reason I (Reginald Jennings) am not the
one who attempted to murder Katy Bell:
 1) I was actually madly in love with Katy; we were having a
    torrid affair.  Neither one of us had any intention of
    breaking it off.  Since she had given up on Ned, we
    were going to move in together; wear each others
    clothes; get a little house with a white picket fence
    and roses vining all over it.  She was going to have my
    children. *sob*

"She'll never darken this doorway again." -- Reginald Jennings