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Subject: Date: 09/22 8:26 AM From: Jan Yarnot, jyarnot@netcom.com UPDATE THURSDAY AUGUST 28 [THE "WHY ME, OH LORD?" UPDATE] Oh, goodie, three of Your Fearless Updater's favorite stories! 1. THE TEENS Lizzie demands her eyeliner back. Sarah says Lizzie took the last of her shampoo. They bicker about Nikolas. Sarah leaves, and Audrey wonders how Sarah puts up with Lizzie. Sarah goes to the olde church. Whaddaya know, Nik comes up. They talk about Steve. They dance on the flowers. At Kelly's Lucky comes in and Bobbie talks baby talk to him. She tries to find out what's bothering him, and what a surprise, he stonewalls. Bobbie asks if it's Elizabeth, and Lucky says no, but he's reminded of how he wasted a whole summer working for the Pompous Prince. Bobbie thought he enjoyed working pediatrics. [Right. He's a Spencer. Altruism is not exactly his strong suit.] Lucky says he hates Nikolas. Bobbie tries to diffuse this. Lucky says every time Laura sees Nikolas she cries. [Your Fearless Updater wants to comment that this is due, mostly, to Luke and Lucky.] Lizzie [Hey, it's another "L" name!] starts to come in, and overhears Lucky tell Bobbie that Stefan killed Steve. 2. KAT AND BAT (Thank you, Allynn!) Alexis pours tea for George the caretaker and Leo. She prompts George, telling him that it's important to Nik's future that Stefan hears what he has to say. Meanwhile, NIk, Stefan and Katherine are at lunch at the Port Charles Grille. Nik talks about being home. He also says how difficult it is to shop at Wyndhams. Nik leaves. Kat and Bat make arrangements to be together that night. She wants to be discreet. He leaves. As Katherine leaves, she runs into Scott. [WAAAAH! Your Fearless Updater wants to get Port Charles!] They exchange pleasantries. They talk about Serena and Dominique, and living with Kevin and Lucy. Katherine says that in the end, she wasn't after his money. [Oh, I don't know. Damian sure was.] Stefan comes home and says hello to George and Leo. George has secrets. He's afraid of Helena. There were secret tunnels and Kristin and Natasha escaped. 3. SONNY AND BRENDA Brenda is catching a cold and is late... for the Christmas campaign. It's hard to leave everyone. Joseph and Jason come to the door. Sonny want's Lucy's marketing report. BrainDead asks why, not remembering that she's not supposed to be asking questions and she wouldn't understand the answer anyway. Joseph will drive Brenda, and they leave. Sonny tells Jason he's getting out. He loves Brenda so much he can't think straight and that's going to get them both killed. He woke up on the yacht heading to Florida with no idea how he got there. He describes the whole stupid caper: "Brenda as backup --- geeze." Jason asks, "what about you?" Sonny claims he'll be happy. Jason proves he's not stupid by thinking they'll need the marketing report so they can go where Jax Cosmetics doesn't advertise. Sonny asks him to give them a month. Fight or Run. Sonny goves Jason the mob. Jason wonders if he can get the respect. Sonny tells him to use the bodyguards and the car, and to be careful and smart and stay alert. Brenda goes to the Outback. Edward is pontificating at Ned, saying Brenda is afraid to go to the Grille, she'll see Jax and realize she ought to have her head examined. [But Edward, they'd find nothing!] She comes up. Edward asks her if she'll change her mind. "Never. Sonny is the man I love, Edward." [Yeah, and next month?] "Then there's no accounting for taste." Ned pops in: "People say that to Grandmother all the time." "Eh?" Brenda asks Edward to give her away. He harrumphs and is pleased and leaves. Ned gripes. HE is the best bride-giver-away-er in existence. He can march rings around that old fool. Brenda wants him for something else. She wants him to be her maid of honor. She also wants him to buy her share of L&B. It was always Lois' business. He says yes for Brooke's sake. She leaves. The Tin Man (we know because of the origami bird) watches.