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From: jyarnot@netcom.com (Jan Yarnot) Subject: GH: Update, Thanksgiving, Nov 23, 1995 Date: Wed, 29 Nov 1995 16:09:13 -0800 It's a series, folks. This was Part Two of Thanksgiving, 1994, which made Soap Opera Digest's "most dysfunctional Thanksgivings" list. The unifying theme for both years is Sigmund, of course. (Even though I truly suspect that the duck of last year was not really Sigmund and that Kevin took a bit of poetic license and convenient amnesia when he gave the real Sigmund to Lucy.) Also, in a nice bit of symmetry, last year Lucy threw the duck at Kevin and stormed off, whereas this year, finding the duck helped bring them back together. But I wax philosophical where I'm supposed to be telling you what happened. PUTTING THE FUN IN DYSFUNCTIONAL: THE QUARTERMAINES HAVE A HARMONIOUS FAMILY THANKSGIVING. What is Thanksgiving without the Quartermaines? It would be no fun at all! AJ: Say, Grandfather, I hear the Tokyo deal fell apart. Too bad Ned mishandled such a --- Edward: I uh suggest that you stay off that subject. Now, no matter what Ned did or didn't, it'll be a cold day in Hell before you're in any position to criticize him! Alan: Of course, Father. How dare anyone criticize Ned? Bigamist, manipulator, apple of your eye. Edward: Well, at least he can hold his liquor! Monica, storming in: That's enough! Edward: I beg your pardon? Monica: I mean it, Edward. Now, Emily is upstairs, getting ready for her first Thanksgiving without her mother. And for her sake, we are going to celebrate it with warmth, with sensitivity, and with family togetherness! (yelling) If it kills us! Edward: And well it might! If ever a man was surrounded by such a pack of incompetents --- Lila: Edward! SHUT UP! Edward: I will NOT be told to shut up in MY HOUSE! Monica: It's MY house! (Alan interjects: I gave it to you!) And as long as you're living in it [underlying threat to send him back to Kelly's] you'll behave yourself. Lila: Not just for Emily's sake. I too find the family fireworks quite fatiguing. That is why I've decided to break with tradition. Instead of dining on turkey and sniping at each other, we're going to have a harmonious meal [I think Lila's been at the cooking sherry already!] over duck a l'orange. (Smiles in a tiddly way. Hope triumphing over experience yet again.) WHO NEEDS FOOD? Katherine and Mac are too busy smooching to cook, so they order Peking Duck. She's a little disappointed that her plans to cook him a traditional meal have fallen through, but he assures her Chinese food IS traditional to him. AT THE BROWNSTONE: Tony notices the turkey has shrunk. Turns out they are having roast duck instead, as Bobbie burning the turkey last year (which I still don't understand. Overcooking it, sure, but burning it to a crisp takes a lot longer than that!) turned out so badly, and she thought she'd try something new. Tony says he's become an expert at rolling with the punches and Bobbie is grateful. But there is one thing. He has invited Lucy and Sigmund. DUCK, DUCK, WHO'S GOT THE DUCK? Meanwhile, Lucy has lost Sigmund. He's not in the bath, not in the cooking sherry (of course not, Lila's had it all!) A window is open. Where can he be? Back at Katherine's apartment, the lovers have unliplocked long enough to order the food and answer the door. But that's all. KatyBelle is still eating, and still unattractive doing it. There's frantic knocking at the door. It's Lucy! "Mac, Mac, my very dear friend!" She tells him about Sigmund, and Katherine snears: "all this high drama for a duck, Lucy?" "I wouldn't expect YOU to understand!" Lucy responds. Mac really doesn't want to leave Katherine, but he questions Lucy: "You two hadn't quarreled? No fights, no disagreements?... You haven't struck him recently, have you?" at which Lucy strikes Mac, yelling "NO! I would never do that!" (Meanwhile, she is absentmindedly eating their food.) Mac suggests that Siggy is just out exploring and that Lucy should go home and wait for him. Lucy: "Are you insane? I can't do that, I have to find him, I have to DO something!" Mac tells her nothing can be done until 24 hours have passed. Lucy pleads with him... "I came to you of all people because I thought you would help....You care about him, you know him, he's supposed to be your friend." She turns to Katherine: "SHE has done this to you, hasn't she?" Katherine has stolen his conscience. Then Lucy discovers it's DUCK they're eating. "How COULD you?" Katherine points out "it's not YOUR duck, Lucy!" but Lucy doesn't believe her till Mac reminds her that Peking duck takes days to prepare. When she's gone, Katherine enjoys picking up more food and preparing to enjoy it. They return to smooching and eating. [Ick.] Meanwhile, back at the Quartermaine's, the harmony is limping on, with a little help from the gin. Edward: Ah, thank you, Reginald. A little sauce of the juniper will make me a benign patriarch. [Only if it knocks him out cold. There's not enough gin in the world to accomplish this!] AJ: Whatever works. Monica: AJ! Ned and Lois come in. Emily runs happily toward them. She is smiling today. Ned is carrying his samisen and Lois explains that it's insurance. "Since Mr. Q. is making noises about sending Ned to Tokyo" she gave him a way to make music there. "That way, even in Tokyo he'll still be my Eddie." Edward: Well, my dear, you really do have a sense of humor. Lois: Ummmm. A quality (she explains to Emily) necessary for survival in this place. Ned and Lois tell about the bank. Neither Lila nor Monica like the "nickel-and-dime" comment. Edward: Light hearted sparring. Pare of the preliminary skirmishes. The battle has yet to commence. Lois: There is no battle. The battle is over. It's not even an issue. Edward: Is that so? Monica, warningly: Edward, you promised! Ned: Promised what? Alan: A harmonious family holiday. Lois (with Ned in the background mouthing "harmonious? family? Oh yes!" in one of the funniest scenes of the day): Oh, what a great idea! We can do harmonious, can't we, Mr. Q.? Edward: Of course. I can deal with you tomorrow. Emily looks a bit distraught, small wonder. Back at the Brownstone, there are Felicia and Maxie working on hors-d'oeurves when Tom comes bouncing in. He plans to go play with the kids and Felicia in the back, and Tommy comes bouncing down, off to Thanksgiving dinner with MaryMae and family (OK, the other storylines have rolled on, it's time GH decided what to do about MM!) Tom can't let this go, so he makes sure Tommy will be back at the Hardy's to help Steve cheer on PCU. Simone looks a tad upset, and Justus like a thundercloud, but they agree, and Felicia eavesdrops on Tom telling his mother to tell Simone she's expected. She, Felicia, points out to Tom how he's using Tommy, and Tom tries the "poor little abused me" routine till Felicia calls him on it, telling him he's passing it on to Tommy. Tom asks for Felicia to help him if he does this again, and in bursts Lucy! "My very best friend in the world, I need your help!" Tom, the dear sweet man, suggests "ducknapping", which panics Lucy. At this point, Bobbie comes in looking for her recipe to find out when to turn the ducks. "MURDERESS!!!!" screams Lucy, and Tom rather foolishly keeps her from clawing Bobbie's eyes out. Bobbie snottily explains that they bought their ducks from the butcher yesterday. "So you're going to eat them today. Without a qualm. How? Could you? " and turning to Felicia "How could YOU?" and Lucy stalks out. Katherine and Mac are still in their clinch and the doorbell rings. It's Kevin, who looks surprised to see Katherine in her own apartment. Oh. They convince him to sit, which he does, and starts to eat, absentmindedly. He's not exactly in a holiday mood. Mac tells him about Sigmund, Katherine asks how the relationship with Lucy is going, they discuss Lucy for a while, while Kevin polishes off a good deal of the meal. Kevin heads out to look for Sigmund, and Mac says to call him if he needs him. Kevin says "You're a good man, Mac", as Katherine and Mac return to their clinch. Back at the mansion, Jason and Keesha come in, with Edward huffing: "Well, you're late." Keesha says hi to Lila and gives a headpiece to Emily, which matches her dress perfectly. AJ thanks Keesha for covering up for him, and all he's drinking is orange juice. Jason, jealous, comes up, taking a sip of AJ's drink. The two brothers start shoving and telling each other to back off, and Lois poings out they are doing harmonious this year. "WHAT?" says Jason in total disbelief. Lois explains "Well, you know, it's just a concept, but you know, it's like all of us trying to get along together, huh?" You can head Edward muttering something about "totally ridiculous" as Reginal escorts Lucy in. Lucy: Edward, thank God you're here,[like where else would he be?] listen, I need your help. No I don't need your help I need your clout, I need your influence, I need your POWER! Edward: What are you babbling about? Lucy: My duck! Edward: Huh? Lucy: Sigmund. You see, he's disappeared or he's gone or he's misplaced or I'm really beginning to believe that someone ducknapped him. So I want you to call the police. I want you to pull some strings and use your clout and influence and get them to help me! Edward: I'm sorry, that's beyond the scope of ... Lucy: NO IT'S NOT! Nothing is beyond Edward Quartermaine's scope! I mean, the whole town is talking about how you're going to get AJ off from that DWI so please, why don't you use your power to help someone innocent? [Lessee, last year she offended everyone in the family but Jason, and only offered AJ a drink, so this year I guess she's evening it out.] Please! Mother Quartermaine? Reginald: Duck's ready. **************************************************************************** Now pay attention to this part, it's LUCY'S CREED and was the very deuce to transcribe, I dunno how Razz and the other K&L transcribers do so well. Lucy talks sixteen to the dozen and about wore out my pause button. **************************************************************************** Lucy (in great pain): DUCK???? [Of course, they all do, even Emily, and don't even think of getting up till the following speech is over.] What are you people doing? Do you even think about your actions? Dining on little innocent blameless waterfowl? What about those little ducks, using them to satisfy your basest instincts? What is it? Duckycide is a crime against nature, don't you know that? All the little feathered creatures want is a pond to paddle around in don't you see? and they want to be your friends. And how do you repay them? MURDER! BLOODSHED! AND ORANGE SAUCE! This has got to stop somewhere! It's got to stop here! That's what I'm trying to say. Please! Please people please, let it stop here, I beg you! Lucy leaves, and Emily sums it up. "WOW!" The Quartermaines (except for Edward, but Lila makes a quorum) decide not to have duck, so Lila tells Reginald "you know what to do". Brave BRAVE Reggie heads to the kitchen to confront Cook, and somehow lives to order the pizza. They sing and eat. Bobbie Tony and Tom discuss Dr. Dorman, and Luke and Lucky arrive bearing pecan pies. Lucky tells of his adventure. At Mary Mae's, Simone calls Audrey, who says yes indeed they are expecting Tommy. And there's Lucy! She's come to ask for Councilman Ward's help, and yes, he calls the police to report a missing duck. Lucy leaves, but is delighted to hear that Mary Mae is having turkey. She is a wonderful warm human being. Lucy goes to Kevin's. Thank goodness Razz has already transcribed this, but it starts with Lucy "Don't YELL at me!" and Kevin "I'M NOT YELLING!!" They worry, discuss feelings about the duck, and hear quacking. At the park, at the pond, Sigmund has found a ladylove, Billie. Lucy agrees to let him stay overnight with his inamorata, but then he must come home and be a good duck. Ick ick ICK! Katherine and Mac are still smooching on the couch when Robin comes by to see Mac and tell him she loves him. She absentmindedly eats some food. "Nothing Sonny cooked last night can compare to this." When she's gone to the Penthouse, Katherine notices that everyone came to see Mac, but she liked it, even Lucy, because they all depended on him to be there for them. I'm going to close with some of Lynelle's summary (which I'm using with permission!) because she said some of the things I would have said. Subject: GH: Murder..Bloodshed..Orange Sauce...It's Thanksgiving on GH! I just wanted to say THANKS to GH for that wonderful Thanksgiving Day show! The heart-warming, uplifting scenes -- with the funny moments designed to give us some laughs -- were just what we needed to round out a most emotional week on GH. We've had Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Thanksgiving Day all rolled into one big week. I loved the theme, with Lucy hunting all over Port Chuck for her lost "child"/duck, Sigmund. The story truly came full cycle with last year's show, which ended with Lucy thrusting the duck into Kevin's arms and saying, "Pluck the duck, Kevin," as she headed off for her misadventures in Puerto Rico. Last year, Lucy's trek around Port Charles was made in an effort to find someone willing to "dispatch" the duck for her so that she could cook it for dinner. And this year that idea was totally loathesome to her. It was during her Thanksgiving Day last year that she started to become fond of Sigmund -- though at that time, he had no name, other than "Jerome". Since then, we've had so many wonderful scenes involving Sigmund -- and Lucy and Kevin -- that I thought it was most fitting for Lucy to make her trek through Port Chuck again in her frantic search for her little lost duck. And it was certainly a nice tie-in to last year's show to have Kevin presenting the duck to Lucy (figuratively speaking, of course.) I like it when there's so much meaning -- so many memories of so many scenes -- all nicely tied up in a nice big ribbon for the viewers. [massive deletions] Lucy's visit to the Quartermaines' was funny also, with them ducking when she said "duck" -- didn't they do that the last time also? Cute scene! And the scene where Lucy visited Justus and Simone, demanding that Justus call the police was another funny one. [Simone chiming in helped, too.] [more snipping] The last scene with the Quartermaines around the formal dining table with the large take-out pizzas --- reminding us again of last year's show --- was funny. I especially liked it when they all started singing "We Gather Together" -- and then as Edward and Lila had their eyes closed, everyone was sneaking a pizza away. This was truly a perfect episode as far as I was concerned. It helped us to feel a little happiness in the midst of a sad story. I liked the way that Robin came to visit Mac and Katherine. We didn't need to see her with Stone on this day, as we'd had the other very sad "Christmas Eve" and "Christmas Day" shows. But we needed to see Robin, since there is hope for her to go on with life after Stone is no longer with her. I thought this detail was handled very well. [ I totally agree (which is why I put it in, *duuuuuh*!)] [more cuttings] I was by myself when I watched GH. And I just felt this warm glow from watching it, as if I could feel all the love that went into making this show for us, and I wanted to give some of it back. [snip] I wanted to hug GH for giving me this gift. I know we can't have heart-warming or uplifting scenes every day. But once in awhile adults need this also. And it surely wouldn't hurt those ratings if GH did it again. A little "viewer satisfaction" goes a long, long way. Lynelle FGC Kevin Unlimited and ---Jan--- (Lila, cut down on those martinis!)