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From: jyarnot@netcom.com (Jan Yarnot) Subject: GH: Update Thursday September 7 Date: Fri, 8 Sep 1995 19:56:08 GMT A two week hiatus, getting blisters and taking many many many pictures at Yellowstone, and now adjusting to the Empty Nest: Without further ado, the update. BAD DAY AT CHARLES STREET Well, says MaryMae to Justus, give! You can't waltz in here spreading doom and gloom and then pause overnight for dramatic effect. Justus announces that WalMart^H^H^H^H^H^H^H uh, DayCo, has bought the wooded property and is planning to build a super-mega-discount store. MaryMae isn't too sure why this is bad news for Charles Street until Laura and Justus give her the scoop on undercutting the local merchants then raising prices. [Head to rec.arts.books for the same discussion apropos Barnes and Noble]. Who could be responsible? Justus, of course, suspects the Quartermaines. Laura will talk to Monica, and MaryMae announces that if Edward is behind it, the Lord better have mercy on his soul, because *she* certainly won't! Nice segue to storyline #3, then. Damian and Katybelle, in Boring and Nastysha mode, are at the Outback. Katherine tells Damian she doesn't like him being cruel. (Call the Herald!) But he has exciting news, he has bought a chain of 10 super-mega-discount stores and plans to put the eleventh right on Charles Street. (Thereby, hello? making even more possible suspects for his murder. You know, I can only think of one person who might want to murder me: Damian is cutting quite a path!) They giggle over the cleverness of the name DayCo (for DAmian, get it?) and their undoing of the prigs in the Foundation. Meanwhile, those wild&crazy youth at the Foundation are discussing music for Stone's party. AJ, the 25-yr-old fossil, favors Van Morrison but gets hooted down. Justus comes in and tells them about DayCo and they switch to plans for bolstering the local merchants. AJ suggests (not that HE has ever finished college!) a class in microeconomics, which will doubtless go over very well. JUST ANOTHER HOLE IN HIS HEAD Luke and Lucky and Foster sneak into the house. Lucky misses the old days when kinky ol' Dad would dress up his wife as a Girl Scout and buy her cookies in the woods. [Emily better stay FAR away from this man!] When Laura gets home and sees the earring (well, the fishing line, now *there's* a hypo-allergenic substance!) she goes ballistic, especially when she hears about the fishhook and the booze. She rightly thinks it isn't so much about giving Lucky an earring, as it is about getting back at her. When she finds out about Sonny, words fail her. Luke storms out, telling Lucky Mom is unreasonable, and along comes Emily, and they are introduced. Luke kisses her hand and turns her head (I grew up fatherless and remember 11 quite well: Ned, Alan, Luke, it all makes perfect sense. She's still looking for Daddy. My fourth grade teacher (and my sixth) had to put up with a lot.) Emily and Lucky discuss their unreasonable living situations while Laura eavesdrops. SOME LIKE IT HOT, or I ENJOY BEING A GIRL Filly is lurking around Mac. (I wish she WOULD get a voice extraction. And a life. Somewhere else.) Katybelle and Damian come in and Damian thanks Mac for the, uh, watersports. Felicia's ears are flapping and her mouth soon follows, but the phone rings and she answers. Sure, they would be glad to host a cocktail party for Madame Maia's psychos, uh, psychics, tonight. Mac tries to get it moved to LUKE's or the park or anywhere else: "I don't like all this loony mumbo-jumbo about past lives and dirty auras and I refuse to support it." Felicia is adamant. I mean, he would even host Republicans, wouldn't he? Mac calls Kevin and panic ensues. Mac talks him into it. "If we're going to go down in flames we might as well get it over with, and there's something to be said for failing on friendly turf." Kevin sums it up: "We're dead men. Or women. At least we have a choice." The men shave their legs. (Kevin: "I'm not doing it and you can't make me.") They attempt eye makeup. Kevin hitches up his Merry Widow. He looks at an eyelash curler, totally baffled. It "bears a striking resemblance to a gynecological instrument." They decide whatever it is, they don't need it. (Earlier they'd rejected the idea of bikini wax. Wimps.) At the Outback the party has begun and Lucy comes in. It's soon apparent that Kevin has a much better idea of how to act like a woman among women than she has. She goes up to the bar and makes small talk with Felicia, hoping to make a date to do whatever it is women friends do when they get together. Uh, shopping, a movie! She leaves and Felicia says to Icky (who has made Lucy a "happy little drink" and is happy himself about his opening in NYC, may he only fall on the third rail of the subway!) "Who do you think is weirder; Madame Maia or Lucy? Tossup, isn't it?" [Yep, voice extraction.] Kevin and Mac teeter in in costume. They meet Madame Maia who introduces them to: LUCY! Kevin says how pleased s/he is to meet her, and Lucy says "You have GOT to be kidding." Are they busted? -- Jan Yarnot, net.granny, RABbabe, Proud Mom to Stands-With-a-Book, the Booklist Boy, the IRS Guy, the Tycoon, and Sunbunny. Nifty Fifty (growing older is mandatory, growing up is optional.) jyarnot@netcom.com Hey, Major League Baseball! Grow up!!