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regional manager, this week I step up to sales lead, aka "key holder". Much like when I first got this job, the proper response is "Um...congratulations?" <g

Last week, our store manager pulled me aside to "talk to me in the back room". I knew what was coming...she asked me to be a key holder. Essentially what that means is I'd be doing what I already do, plus I would learn to open and close the store, deal with the register, prep the store when there's different promotions and other minor duties. SM gushed on and on about what a "magnificent" worker I am, how I've "wildly exceeded her expectations" and how I pick things up so quickly. She was so excited to offer me the position of sales lead/key holder.

I...don't really want to be a key holder. First of all, I don't love the idea of being responsible for the cash drawers. Second of all, I don't love the idea of having to be at the store early to open it, especially when the weather's bad and I don't want to be out driving in it (I had yet another bad experience driving home Saturday after the snow turned to rain and then turned to ice; my car was encased in ice when I came out and the roads were slippery or bumpy with ice in spots). Third of all, if (WHEN, dang it!) I get another job, it will be a waste of training, and I will be greatly disappointing SM and B (Big Grandma Energy) who open/close every day except every other weekend when LD works (she has a full time job and only works at Chico's for the clothing discount) who are counting on me to be a key holder, allowing them more time off (especially SM, who hasn't had more than 1 day a week off in literal years). Finally, and I can't stress this enough, I don't like my job. It would be *just* about tolerable if all I was expected to do was direct customers to what they're looking for and ring them up, but we're expecting to push, push, push, sell, sell, SELL, and I'm just not comfortable trying to (and occasionally succeeding in) talk customers into buying things they don't really want and certainly don't need.

And yet I said yes because it's a (pathetically small) bump in pay* that will just barely cover my bills (I've been dipping slightly into savings every couple of months since starting this job) and the job prospects continue to be brutal. I'm mostly looking at another manufacturing job or maybe something in an office somewhere; all the manufacturing jobs require standing, bending and lifting 50+ pounds (nope) and all the office jobs require proficiency in Microsoft programs and often a computer program I've never even heard of, and they're seemingly not willing to train anyone, preferring someone who can jump in on the first day and only ask where the coffee maker is. Right now, it's better for me to have a job I hate than no job (I quit the last job because I hated it but I had sufficient savings built up to not need to work for at least a couple years). On a semi-related note, I asked B one night if they have a lot of people applying to work at our workplace--we've had a "now hiring" sign up since last summer--and she told me no. In the 9 years she's been at our store, the only applicants have been the people I currently work with and three others, all of whom were hired but left. Two of those who left did so because SM didn't like them and made their lives miserable; the other retired, I think.

* When I say a pathetically small bump in pay, I mean "I can now go to Giant Eagle and get paid more to be a cashier". Which...I actually considered, as it would be a much shorter drive, I'd get to work with a friend (I've known "M" since the early days at the bindery), I'd have a guaranteed parking spot (and thus wouldn't have to go outside on a freezing cold day to move my car so someone can get out) and probably nobody would come up to me and say "I'm making dinner tonight...what groceries should I buy?". But there's still the problem of being on my feet all day and working an erratic schedule, and as the new person, I'm guessing I would be scheduled for days/times I don't really want to work. Anyways, I mentioned to SM when accepting my new role that while I knew there was nothing she could do directly about it, it was absolutely "gross" how little we get paid, especially when our stores are usually located in affluent areas and charge $180 for a single pair of jeans. I told her maybe that's why nobody's applying for a job and she could at least kick it up the ladder a little and say something to the regional manager, who probably also has no say but could maybe also kick it up the ladder and so on and so on. SM, as she always does, got a bit defensive (even when I stressed it wasn't a criticism of her personally) and told me I'm not the only one "in this boat", but I reminded her that all the other ladies I work with have a secondary source of income. LD works in the school system, in a high up supervisory role. B, LC and S all have husbands; LC and S have husbands that are still working. In addition, B, LC and S all had pretty high-paying careers before coming to work at our store. S, B, D and M are all old enough to be collecting some, or all, of their Social Security, as is, I'm fairly certain, SM. I'm the only one trying to live solely on my pay from the store (though yes, I can always sponge off of Dad if I wanted to...but I don't want to).

It's a little weird right now how both my bff and my good church friend are in similar boats. Both of them work jobs that don't pay enough and don't offer enough hours. Both of them love what they do (unlike me), and both of them have occasional other sources of income (bff sometimes helps a family member with data entry and gcf gets paid both for dog-sitting the neighbor's pup and driving another neighbor whenever he needs a ride). Bff and I were talking during the Super Bowl last night; she knows she needs another part-time job and is dreading possibly having to go back into nursing in any capacity. Gcf is expanding from home health care (more a home companion, as she does chores but doesn't— do anything like bathing clients, administering meds or dressing wounds, etc.) and is looking into possibly being a nanny again. She was a nanny for about 15 years for a very nice family and she absolutely adores children, so hopefully that's something that will work out for her.

Anyways...that's my update. I'm off to work this afternoon and am working today, tomorrow, Wednesday and Thursday. And then I get a rare 3 day weekend (honestly, in the 28 weeks I've been at my job--and yes, it's been that long already <g>--I've never worked the same schedule any random two of those weeks). During those three days, I will be stepping up the job search even more.